I want to die

Do you have any idea how little that narrows it down?

I can’t see the point of going to an empty store

… what do you do in stores, exactly?

You’re still that salty over some random joke comment?

You can send me the therapy bill

It is! And makes the place feel a bit more human, somehow

Don’t have to when living in a country where keeping your shoes on indoors at someone else’s house would be incredibly rude

Don’t need a doormat when you are one I guess

Oh yeah, I’ve worked in a bunch of offices where the policy was to leave shoes at the door, or to change into office slippers etc. It’s not at all uncommon in Helsinki; keeps the office clean in the months when the streets are full of slush and grime

That’d be the point, yeah

See, you get it

Only barbarians wear shoes in their own homes.

Shit, even wearing shoes in an office job can be kinda sus.

edit: DOWNVOTE ME HARDER YOU FILTHY BARBARIAN HORDE, you know in your heart of hearts that I’m right

“This here’s for salt, this is for pepper, and this is for weapons-grade cocaine”

You’re thinking of a different “email”. The one you’re referring to was a parody but the one this post refers to is 100% real

Ohh it’d be hilarious to try and find cursed resumes.

However that would mean signing up for LinkedIn and I’d rather repeatedly hit myself on the head with a hammer. The brain damage would be about equal