The stuff you get at a restaurant is frequently 100% actual cheese + emulsifier. Even Dairy Queen. The stuff in a grocery store is hit or miss, though. Kraft Singles for example cannot even legally call themselves American Cheese. They are a “Pasteurized Prepared Cheese Product”. Always check the small print on the label for “American Cheese” that’s on its own.

Alternatively, appease the puritans and give both a sports bra

Fr there’s a huge portion of furries that are 100% nonsexual about it

Being attracted to furries is like being attracted to aliens. They’re not animals.