What’s the alternative?

Open your music app yourself, select the song, and press play.

The actual ‘grown up’ take.

A bit of hot sauce or balsamic vinegar is way better. And healthier.

(And lol at every fucker out there who thinks they invented some magical special sauce by mixing mayo and ketchup together. Like nobody’s ever thought of that white trash culinary masterpiece before.)

Wait until you find out about tree pollen!

Stop asking for cover letters.

Congratulations, you’ve passed the vibe check.

Because my ChatGPT cover letter has a direct shortcut to their AI-addicted brains.

🙌

They’ll make for some good shitposts when they come back out.

There’s no memes up my butt, either.

Okay, give me an actual voltage reading, why not?

I’d take it over an RPM gage.

Depends if it has a manual or automatic transmission. In a manual, I really want a tachometer.

Do you not…?

Would not recommend. If you’ve seen shows like that with the laugh tracks removed, they’re dreadful. Full of dead pauses while the characters wait between their lines for the laughs to end.

Fun fact: a half hour comedy script is 22 pages (22 minutes of content, after the ad breaks). But a half hour comedy script for a show with laugh tracks is 11 pages, 11 minutes. Literally half the show’s runtime is taken up by laugh tracks.

And you don’t like sexual assault jokes played for the same canned laughter?

Or maybe people who dislike body shaming.

Or maybe people who dislike ripping shitloads of memes from reddit and reposting them on Lemmy with little other engagement.

Quick and easy cleanup, though.

Never have to do dishes again, with this one simple trick!

Which is generally fine on such a small screen.

Because it’s just the imaginings of someone who thinks they’re superior for wanting their coffee black.

(Also, lol, why would you ever go to a coffee shop for that? You can very easily make it at home. Even when traveling, a lot of hotels can provide you with plain coffee just fine.)

I’m nowhere near smart enough to do something this stupid. It would never occur to me.