• WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today
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    2 days ago

    This is so depressing for some reason. Even women can’t get a date with women.

    On the other hand, I at least don’t need to 😁

    • Town@lemmy.zip
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      2 days ago

      I think it’s funny when average women who normally have no issue finding guys suddenly have no idea how to do the hard work of getting with another woman.

      • Ilovethebomb@sh.itjust.works
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        2 days ago

        It’s because they’re not used to doing any work whatsoever.

        Seriously, the reason bumble failed was women simply will not send a message.

        • yermaw@sh.itjust.works
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          1 day ago

          I get called sexist for this, but I think this is basically the reason catfish scams work so easily on older women. When a man comes out of nowhere acting interested in you its just normal. Been a bit rare lately, but it doesnt immediately invoke suspicion.

          When i get a message on any platform from a woman, especially unprompted, I immediately ignore it. So often now to the point that they’re as invisible as popup ads.

          • Ilovethebomb@sh.itjust.works
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            1 day ago

            Yeah, I’ve got a pretty good idea of when someone is completely out of my league, and when I get contacted out of the blue like that, I’m immediately suspicious.

        • PieMePlenty@lemmy.world
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          2 days ago

          Look at it from the other side: it worked for people who wanted the kind of relationship where women aren’t the ones being chased and set a more even ground.
          The problem is that it is a for profit business and the proportion of such relationship seekers is small. More women just like being chased… Bumbe is still around, they didn’t fail, but they had to let this model go, because they wanted more profit.

        • Jessicat@lemmy.world
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          2 days ago

          It worked for me :) Found my awesome husband there. Agreed though, there are definitely women who expect to be pursued.

          • Ilovethebomb@sh.itjust.works
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            2 days ago

            I found the number of women that would actually send a message was perhaps one in ten. A chunk would just let the match expire, the others would send either one of the Gif options, or “hey”.

            Half of them had an identical account on Tinder anyway.

            • Jessicat@lemmy.world
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              2 days ago

              Yeah I get that. A lot of (male) matches on bumble didn’t engage with me either after I sent a message. I’m not a wordsmith by any means but I always tried to mention something I saw in their profile and ask a question. I figured if anything it showed a bit of effort as a minimum. Never tried tinder.

              • Ilovethebomb@sh.itjust.works
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                2 days ago

                Interesting that men are pretty bad as well, I had a similar approach to you, try and mention something in their profile. It’s part of the reason I think Hinge is the best of the apps right now.

                • Jessicat@lemmy.world
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                  2 days ago

                  I haven’t been dating online since 2021 so I can’t really comment on the current scene . I hope it treats you well!

                • Jessicat@lemmy.world
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                  2 days ago

                  I treated internet dating as a numbers game. Hard to get too upset about someone initially just not responding. It would feel more personal to me when we would be talking for a bit and they would just ghost. Your comparison is fair, people put varying levels of effort into their relationships in general.

    • Gorilladrums@lemmy.world
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      2 days ago

      One of the funniest things is watching women who talk down to guys having trouble dating women by calling them ugly, insufferable, or creepy, only for them to struggle just as much, if not more, to do the same.

      • SealofLove@leminal.space
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        2 days ago

        To be fair, it’s much harder to find a woman who’s also attracted to women. Much smaller pool to choose from.

        • Gorilladrums@lemmy.world
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          2 days ago

          True, but even in dating apps where you can easily access individuals in this demographic, they still struggle. Women in general are just extremely more selective than men. Gay men, for example, don’t have this issue.

          • bitjunkie@lemmy.world
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            1 day ago

            It’s having a hard time pulling vs. having a hard time finding someone who is relationship material, regardless of orientation.

      • WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today
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        2 days ago

        I wish, nope. I am like too miserable to care about dating 😀

        I just don’t feel the desperate or need to partner, because I have more immediate suffering.