• SharkWeek@lemmy.blahaj.zoneEnglish
      4·
      3 days ago

      That’s … not a good opener if you want to find yourself a real Domme.

      You should be more respectful, at least to begin with.

      • captainlezbian@lemmy.worldEnglish
        3·
        3 days ago

        I’ve found a cocky grin with a “hey” goes really far when hitting on dommes irl. But I also have fuckboi energy so it fits the vibe.

        For any fellow subs reading this, you hit on dominant women like any other woman. When it comes time to flirtatiously joke around, then you can make some jokes about being submissive, but you want to have the situation felt out enough that you’re confident that she’s flirting back and that she’s receptive to such jokes. You never want to come off as a pushy sub, a lot of dommes have bad experiences with them (hell, even I, a sub, have had one)

        • SharkWeek@lemmy.blahaj.zoneEnglish
          3·
          3 days ago

          Exactly. Though if you’re being a good little worm you shouldn’t need to make jokes about being a sub for her to know what the deal is.

          • captainlezbian@lemmy.worldEnglish
            4·
            3 days ago

            Unfortunately for me, many people read extroversion and confidence as dominance, so i have to be quite clear how easy it is to bring me to my knees and that no I really don’t switch

            • SharkWeek@lemmy.blahaj.zoneEnglish
              2·
              3 days ago

              Ha! That’s a good point - I’m on the flip side, socially I’m quiet and introverted, and I’ve had to lay down the law a couple of times due to crossed wires

              • captainlezbian@lemmy.worldEnglish
                2·
                2 days ago

                Yeah my domme is like that. It’s funny because I’ve come to associate short, introverted, and quiet/awkward women in the community with dominance, but I know that isn’t the stereotype yet lol

            • Anarki_@lemmy.blahaj.zoneEnglish
              2·
              3 days ago

              Big time feels.

              Also apparently (in my experience) being a male means I’m automatically in charge all the time :(

        • yetAnotherUser@discuss.tchncs.deEnglish
          3·
          3 days ago

          I’m not really relevant to your interaction but I thought it was a little cute. Not tactful, but the spirit was there.

          If I wanted to write a similar message like yours, I’d probably have done it like this:

          Let’s say I were to call you a “bitch”. What would your purely hypothetical response be? 🥺

          That’s:

          • less direct
          • playful (“If I were to insult you” is a very fun way to tease AND pretend to be an innocent little angel)
          • probing the water to see if they’re interested

          At least in my opinion. I’m terrible at flirting though so you may want to evaluate this yourself.